I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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