sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize
