D3 body, D1 cock
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize