I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
we're so committed to being not committed
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
