Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Randomize
