I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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