Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
