I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
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