Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
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