its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Come on in and take your pants off
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