i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
i permit you to call me
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
not ubering you a puppy
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
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