Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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