i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
Randomize