it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
last night I used snow as a chaser
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
