he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
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