Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Houston, we have a squirter
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Randomize
