I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
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