whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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