planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize
