Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Randomize
