its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Randomize
