She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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