So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
