i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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