Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize