I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
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