i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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