He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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