I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Randomize
