My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
