Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
tell me about the eggs
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
