We're like a lot better than the average bears
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That's how twitter works, right?
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
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