Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
My balls are so social today.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
When did angry sex become our thing?
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Randomize
