That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Randomize