i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Randomize
