Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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