if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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