Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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