It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
