I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Randomize
