Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
