a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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