I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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