return my video game
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Randomize
