I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
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