Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
