Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize