mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
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