Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
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