I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
