She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Randomize
